Looking back at the season

Well, season is definitely over. We're now into those hot and

humid months where nothing much of note happens culturally.

Here's my annual awards column, a halfserious, half tongue-in-cheek look back at the season, with my quirky, idiosyncratic, made-up awards:

. The Reading Makes You Sexier Award

To Deanna Gibson, who played Billie Dawn in "Born Yesterday" at Florida Repertory Theatre. Call us crazy, but the more she read and the more intelligent she grew, the sexier this former chorus girl became. Smart and blonde trumps dumb and blonde every time, at least in my book.

. The It Isn't Easy Being Green Award

To Marcie Dodd, who played Elphaba in "Wicked" at the Barbara B. Mann Performing Arts Hall: a green girl who comes to embrace her uniqueness.

. The That's How You Know It's Live Theater Award

To Lisa Morgan, playing Maggie in "Dancing at Lughnasa" at the Florida Rep. In one of her character's more rambunctious moments, she grabs a wooden spoon and starts banging on a bread tin, before breaking out into a wild dance with her sisters. On opening night, the head of the spoon broke off and flew right into the audience. Ms. Morgan kept right in character, looked at the spoon handle, exclaimed "Oooooh!" and kept on.

Runner up: Rachel Burttram in "The Art of Murder," also at Florida Rep. In one scene, she tried to close a sliding door, but it wouldn't budge. Ms. Burttram didn't lose her cool, and soon realized fighting with the door was a losing battle.

. The Costumes I'd Most Like in my Own Wardrobe Award

The crazy, creative costumes of the citizens of Oz in "Wicked" at the B.B. Mann. Better than Dr. Seuss!

. The Venue I'll Miss Award

To Theatre Conspiracy's funky location in the strip mall behind Sasse's restaurant. I loved that space, with its mismatched chairs and sofas. It was so off-Broadway, and perfect for the type of off-beat plays Theatre Conspiracy offers. The company has since moved back to its previous home in the Foulds Theatre at the Alliance for the Arts. .

The Our Favorite Dame Award

To Dame Edna at the Philharmonic Center for the Arts, who proves, by her very existence, that there's nothing like a dame. Nothing in the world.

The Best One-Person Show Award .

To Lisa Morgan in "Shirley Valentine" at the Florida Rep. Yes, we saw Hal Holbrook portray Mark Twain and Tovah Feldshuh portray Golda Meir, but neither moved us the way Ms. Morgan did as Shirley.

. The Best Multiple Characters in a Show Award

To, again, Lisa Morgan in "Shirley Valentine" at the Florida Rep. This woman isn't an actress, she's an entire damn village! Runners-up (tie): Chris Clavelli in "Indian Blood" at Florida Rep, playing an irate school teacher and then a gay uncle. And to Dick Westlake, one of our best character actors, playing befuddled characters in "Best Little Whorehouse in Texas" at the Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre.

. The Best Ensemble Award

To the cast of "Dancing at Lughnasa" and the cast of "Indian Blood," both at Florida Rep.

. The Best Invisible Dance Award

To the invisible aunts dancing a racy Charleston in "Indian Blood" at Florida Rep. It must have been really something, judging by the grandmother's shocked, disapproving reaction!

. The Best Dance Award

To the Mundy sisters in "Dancing at Lughnasa" at Florida Rep, who let loose in a frenzy of uninhibited dancing.

. The Best Private Dancer Award

To Jan Wikstrom in "Dancing at Lughnasa." When her sisters started dancing, this uptight, strict character couldn't resist, but went outside in the yard to dance by herself on top of the table.

. The Best Dance in a Musical Award

To the cast of "The Pajama Game" at the B.B. Mann, especially for "Steam Heat" and "Hernando's Hideaway."

. The My Favorite Lush Award

To Lori Ann Freda, who, as Gladys in "The Pajama Game" was hysterically, slide-offthe seat-like-liquid intoxicated in "Hernando's Hideaway." Ms. Freda, who's previously acted on the Naples Dinner Theatre stage, stole the scene and the audience's hearts.

. The Best Charmer Award

(tie) Jason Parish and David S. Howard in "The Last Romance" at Florida Rep, playing the same romantic man at different stages of his life.

. The My Favorite Fop Award

To Mark Vanagas, who played a British lord in "Anything Goes" at the Sugden Community Theatre. He was simultaneously swashbuckling and clueless. I'd seen other productions, and never liked this character, until I saw Vanagas play it for The Naples Players.

. The Thank You for Saving the Show Award

(tie) to Carrie Lund for carrying the show in "Alone Together" at Florida Rep, for displaying her comedic skills and making this show so much better than it was. And to Victor Caroli, who played a dashing imaginary friend in The Naples Players' "Moon Over the Brewery" at Sugden Community Theatre.

. The Show I Almost Walked Out On Award

To "Legally Blonde: The Musical" at the Phil. It insulted my intelligence, and was an insult to theater. I feel bad for pre-teens who think this is what good theater is because they haven't been exposed to anything better.

. The Show I Did Walk Out On Award

"MacBeth" at the Sidney and Berne Davis Center. A nice attempt, with creative costuming and sets, and a few decent performances by major characters. But it was a mistake to cast amateurs. Not even all professional actors can perform Shakespeare well.

. The Best Moment of Exhilaration Award

To "Defying Gravity" in "Wicked" at the B.B. Mann. When Marcie Dodd belted out that song and rose two stories high, you felt as if there's nothing you couldn't accomplish.

. The Cast Your Fate to the Wind Then Take it Back Award

To Rachel Burttram, who, in "Dancing at Lughnasa," falls back in love with the ne'erdo well, then, in "The Art of Murder," takes her life and career back in to her own hands, both at Florida Rep.

. The Best Brooding Monologues Award

To Brendan Powers at Tom in "The Glass Menagerie" at Florida Rep. You didn't want him to leave but cheered his escape.

. The Best Musical Mash-up Award

To the Brubeck Brothers Quartet and Gulf Coast Symphony, performing the works of jazz icon Dave Brubeck. An odd, but most wonderful, marriage.

. The Best Theatrical Mash-up Award

To Joe DiPietro, who wrote "All Shook Up." Performed at the Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre, the play mixes the music of Elvis with the plot of Shakespeare's "Twelfth Night." Sure, you can see the bard's play in New York City's Central Park, but then you wouldn't have all those Elvis tunes, would you?

. The Best Place to Hear Really Interesting Music Award

To the Phil, for its modern dance bookings, which included Hubbard Street Dance Chicago and Momix. Unfortunately, most musical acts that come to Southwest Florida are middle-of-the-road. If you want to hear Moby, or Philip Glass, or David Byrne, or electronica, your best bet is to attend the modern dance series at the Phil.

. The Best Use of a Small Space Award

To the Phil, for putting on a cabaret series and jazz series in the smaller Daniels Pavilion, in addition to Elaine Newton's wonderful book and movie lectures. Especially outstanding this year: The Turtle Island String Quartet and the Hot Club of San Francisco. We'd love to see the Phil use the space even more, and branch out with other genres of music.

. The Best Sex Award

To the cast of "My First Time" at Theatre Conspiracy, who embodied various people's first-time sexual experiences: sweet, awkward, funny.

. The Best Imagined Sex Award

To Daniel Benzing, who played the teen Eddie in "Indian Blood" at Florida Rep, for his cartoon of Glinda the Good Witch and Injun Joe (from "Tom Sawyer") getting it on, with equally wildly unlikely dialogue.

. The Most Creative Way of Learning an Accent Award

To Dolores Fetters of The Naples Players, who learned a Scottish accent for "The Women of Lockerbie" at Sugden Community Theatre by watching DVDs of "Shrek" and "Braveheart." Achh!

. The Most Creative Use of a Bread Wrapper Award

To Kay Francis in "Church Basement Ladies" at the Off-Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre. She wore plastic Wonder Bread bags on her feet to protect her shoes from the Minnesota snow. A great moment in a show that failed to spark.

. The Campiest Performance Award

To the cast of "All Shook Up" at the Broadway Palm Dinner Theatre, who were spot-on in tone and played their over-thetop roles with dead seriousness.

. The Sexiest Glance Award

To Jan Wikstrom, who played Mrs. Stawicki, a buxom secretary in "Indian Blood" at Florida Rep. The come-hither/I know what you're thinking look she gave a teenage boy was perfect… and perfectly hysterical. It must have burned in his dreams for years to come.

. The Best One Word Award

To Carrie Lund, in "The Last Romance" at Florida Rep. Playing an unhappy, prickly, suspicious woman, her yelling "Shaddup!" at the dogs never failed to get a laugh.